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When I complain, I give my power away!

1 May

When I compainI give my power away, blog post (1)

When I complain I give my power away! To understand clearly what this means, I would like to invite you to read  an article I wrote,  “I am not a victim”, that explains clearly this dynamic.

To  be very honest with you doing the 21 days challenge to quit complaining litterally changed my life… It allowed me to stop resisting what was ” happenning to me” and instead be in the flow of my own life. I am now present to each day, present to my family and I get to enjoy all of it. And when something happens that I want to change, then I can concentrate my energy on the solution instead of being a victim of the situation.

I invite you to join the growing movement of people who choose to stop being victims of their lives and to become actors of change. Join the 21 day Iquitcomplaining {… and bitching} challenge at anytime.

I would be honored if you shared your experiences, challenges – successes, on this blog and I will answer any questions you might have.

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

Maybe there is more that brings us together than we think!

13 Mar

Three beautiful minutes!

Thank you TV2 Denmark  for this video, I shared it recently on my english Facebook page.

It brings up interesting and relevant points about how different we are… and, despite those differences, the communality of our human experience.

When we get rid of the habit of complaining in our lives, we begin to create space to see the beauty all around us, and the beauty in people different from us. The habit of judging others disappears…

 

Join the “I quit complaining {…and bitching}”  challenge at anytime… it is free! Become part of the growing movement of people who choose to refuse to be victims of their lives and of others!

#actdontcomplain

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

 

The power of Habit!

8 Jun

The-5

“Hundreds of habits influence our days—they guide how we get dressed in the morning, talk to our kids, and fall asleep at night; they impact what we eat for lunch, how we do business, and whether we exercise or have a beer after work. Each of them has a different cue and offers a unique reward. Some are simple and others are complex, drawing upon emotional triggers and offering subtle neuro chemical prizes. But every habit, no matter its complexity, is malleable. The most severely addicted alcoholics can become sober. The most dysfunctional companies can transform themselves. A high school dropout can become a successful manager. However, to modify a habit, you must decide to change it. You must consciously accept the hard work of identifying the cues and rewards that drive the habit’s routines, then find alternatives and support. You must know you have control and be self-conscious enough to use it—and every chapter in this book is devoted to illustrating a different aspect of why that control is real.”

—Charles Duhigg from The Power of Habit

When I decided to start my 21 Day Challenge to Quit Complaining I did it because I realized that I was constantly “resisting” my days.  I was not conscious of this dynamic because the resistance was mild but it was always there and it showed up in those complaints. I would come home and complain about the mess in my house, the dirty dishes in the sink, about other cars on the road (bad driving is like bad breath, you notice it only when it is someone else’s!) I was complaining about my emails or about my Internet provider – all day long without being aware of it, I was resisting. It was a habit!

I did not want to realize on my deathbed that I had spent my entire life resisting it. I wanted to savor this life – with the messy house, with the demanding kids, with the emails… I wanted to create a new relationship with my (not always very sexy) life.

I undertook a challenge because I wanted to set myself free from this habit.  I knew that having the “intention” to embrace my everyday frustrations with a positive attitude was not going to be enough; I knew that the next day I was going to get caught up in the spiral of daily routines and that I was simply going to forget my good intention.

I wanted to train my brain and create new habits, habits that would set me free from falling into “victim mode,” habits that would allow me to be more present and more responsible in my life.

Can you identify negative habits that get in the way of fully enjoying your life?

If complaining is one of them, I invite you to start the challenge today!

You can read in more detail about the beginning of my journey with the challenge here. The challenge may take you 21 days or an even a year, but I guarantee it will change your life!

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

 

A powerful tool, concrete and delicious!

3 May

Those of you who follow my writing and the message I bring know that two of my favorite themes are learn not to be a victim of everyday life and dare to take risks.

Today I am sharing with you a delicious, concrete and powerful tool that has the potential to transform your life – the gratitude list.

Screen Shot 2016-05-03 at 10.56.00 AM

It’s easy!

What you need:

A pencil or pen and something to write on.

You will place them close to your bed or on your desk.

How?

Every night before you sleep, write down everything that was positive in your day.

Regardless of the trials, you were faced with in that day, write a list of things, people, and events that brought you well-being and made you grateful.

The point is not to write a novel!

At the beginning, especially when we are confronted with a particularly trying day, it may seem impossible.

So we delve a little deeper and we write things that we tend to consider “a given,” such as,

-I am healthy

-I have enough to eat

-I have a comfortable bed

-I have a job…

The following day may be a very good day and you’ll find plenty of other things to write, such as,

-I am healthy

-I had enough to eat

-I have a comfortable bed

-I have a job

-My colleagues and I had a very nice lunch

-My daughter scored 10 out of 10 in math

-I love my yoga class

-My sister visited me

-It was sunny all morning …

By practicing this little exercise every day, you will find that you’ll discover more and more ‘little things’ for which you are grateful that you were not necessarily conscious of…

-The cat is purring

-My neighbor smiled at me

-There was no traffic on the freeway

-I heard an interesting interview on the radio…

In short, all those little details that give flavor to our daily lives and which, once finally recognized and appreciated, help us little by little to build a whole new perspective on life. Your gratitude list will help shine a light on the ‘beautiful and the good’ around you.

It will help you to appreciate and therefore cultivate the abundance and brilliance of your life.

Try it and see.

I assure you that cultivating gratitude is worth it!

Neuroscience proves it; I recommend this article based on research conducted at the University of Berkeley in California  “expanding the science and practice of gratitude”

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

Everyday new opportunities arise!

11 Apr

My “ordinary” life becomes extra{ordinary} when I recognize that I have talents and choose to activate them!

Every day life... (1)

 

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

6 steps to communicate so that you can be heard

3 Mar

A few months ago I wrote an article titled: Learning to express our needs and frustrations differently.part 1 and part 2

Today I want to share with you a visual that I have created to remind myself of this process. I printed it, taped it to my fridge and I am using it every day.

Because sometimes we do have something to say to the people around us. We do need them to help us meet our needs. But it’s not always easy to communicate. The more important the need is, the more chances we have to slip into our blaming and complaining habit and let’s face it it’s exhausting to complain and not feel heard.

6 steps canva

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

I am not a victim!

4 Feb

We are the victim when it comes to our boss, our job (or our lack of employment), the political crisis, our spouse, our family… you’ll notice that we often talk about ourselves as victims. We expend a lot of energy pointing out it’s not our fault – it’s the other person’s fault (our spouse, our children, our boss, our colleague, the President, the administration, service providers) we are in this mess!

I found out for myself that I had managed to develop a talent for pointing the finger at the culprits in my life. In a way, it’s fun to be a victim because if the others are wrong then I am necessarily right. If the other person is guilty then it is up to him to find a solution to the problem, not me. But in the end, what this means (annoyingly enough) is that if the blame is squarely on the other person, I am powerless to do anything.

I have the power to choose to not be a victim! (2)

It is true that it is often easier to be a victim than someone who acts, but when I decide that I am the victim I no longer have the power to take control of my life. In the end, it’s me who suffers the real consequences. Wouldn’t you agree?

When I cast myself as a victim I choose to give my power to the person who is supposedly “guilty.” By pointing the finger I make them the master of my destiny. I realized one day that I was able to refuse to function this way and I have no doubt that you can as well.

We talk to our friends, our relatives, our colleagues, about our lives because we need to interact and share our problems and, yes, that is an inherent part of love and friendship, as are compassion and support… All that is good. I am not saying that we cannot discuss our problems and share our suffering, far from it. But we have the power to REFUSE to cast ourselves as victims of anything, or anyone.

This is one of the biggest revelations of my life, that I was casting myself as a victim and I could easily choose not to.

I think it’s amazing to realize that we have that choice!

By looking at how we talk about ourselves and our problems, we have the choice to either give our power to the so-called culprits… Or not.

Imagine, if you are a no longer a victim, if others are not guilty… Then anything is possible! No?

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to helping people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.comand visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

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