This morning I wanted to share with you a very practical article written by my dear friend Marcy Cole for huffingtonpost.com. Marcy is a Holistic Psychotherapist, Speaker, Author & Connector and I’ve known her for 5 years now. She is a true inspiration to those who want to live their lives fully. You can connect with her on Facebook
The Power Tools to Reverse Road Rage
Dr. Drew’s “Life Changers” show on the CW network featured the topic of road rage on their two segment premier show in September 2011. I was honored to be a guest expert on this particular show and it inspired me to put pen to paper, sharing what I have come to know about road rage and anger management.
Experiencing anger is part of the human experience. It is what we choose to do with it that determines whether it will lead to a breakdown or breakthrough.
Those who experience and act out road rage are literally on the “road” to breakdown. Not only is it measurably harmful to you and your passengers’ mental and physical health, but it most definitely puts your life and every person on the road with you in very real danger.
These five power tools are a strategy to transform the triggered anger, that gets evoked within you, to be a portal for a profound awakening. As with other challenges we face, this too can inspire significant insight into what beckons our attention and calls us into our higher ground. On the heels of every misstep we may take lies a road of discovery that can be both enlightening and healing.
I use the word “power” because often intensified anger and hostile outbursts originate from a sense of powerlessness or dis-empowerment. This method will give you your power back, in a way that is both constructive and lasting.
1): THE POWER TOOL OF COMMITMENT
With this first tool you take full responsibility for the behavior that you want to change and you make a conscious decision to do so. This is based on a keen awareness that “this behavior does not serve me:”
It compromises my physical health.
It is life threatening for myself and for everyone on the road.
It is disruptive to and stressful on the passengers in my vehicle.
It is not good for the emotional development of my children who may be driving in the car with me.
2): THE POWER TOOL OF SUPPORT
With this second tool, you call in the courage to ask for and receive support. There are so many effective techniques to deal with anger and stress management: You can easily Google a plethora of information. Here are a handful of possible methods to explore and experience:
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing)
EFT (Emotional Freedom and Tapping Technique)
Hypnotherapy & Guided Visualization
Insight oriented Psychotherapy
3): THE POWER TOOL OF PERSPECTIVE
Here lies the realization that:
A): What’s happening on the road for you is “not about them.”
This understanding requires you to develop insight into the underlying cause of what is really triggering you. Whether you are explosive in a car or behind closed doors… “Hysterical is Historical.” When we overreact to a current situation it is usually about something un-finished or un-healed from our past that we are projecting onto the present circumstance. Review what carries a charge for you on the road… (i.e.: “He cut me off.”). Trace it to a feeling state: (i.e.: “I feel disrespected.”). Then trace it to what it may remind you of in your past (i.e.: “There was never room for me in family. I felt ignored and invisible”). Gaining clearer perspective allows you to diffuse the situation at hand. It also places your focus into finally attending to past-internalized hurts that have influenced your behavior and blocked you from feeling optimal emotional balance and joy for far too long.
Love and Respect,
Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:
“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE ”I Quit Complaining Starter Kit” on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com