Accepting what is!

31 May

Thank you Rosette Poletti for this beautiful and inspiring text, in complete harmony with the philosophy of I quit complaining!

To accept what is is to be lucid, to wake up, to become conscious, and to consider reality as it is. It is to disengage ourselves from our mental programming, our erroneous beliefs, our blinders.

Accepting what is!

Accepting what is is seeking how to deal with a situation, how to improve it and make it positive whenever possible. It is ceasing to ask, “Why? Why me? “. On the contrary, it is trying to find out ” what for? – To do what? ”

To accept what is, is sometimes to have no choice but to mourn what was, what could have been, what should have been, to live as fully as possible the reality of The moment and try to give it meaning.

To accept what is is to choose to renounce revolt, guilt, resentment, hatred and indifference. In other words, it means living upright, in all our human dignity.

Accepting what is, is the indispensable prelude to all personal growth, all search for a solution, all inner peace.

I would be honored to read what “accepting what is” means to you and how you apply it to your daily life. You can leave your comments on this page below!

Source : Rosette Poletti and Barbara Dobbs, Accepter ce qui est, 2005

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

What is my priority?

8 May

What to do when a person engages in behavior that annoys us?

Most of the time, we want to talk about it in order to change the behavior. Before opening our mouth, let’s ask ourselves the question: “What is my priority?”

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“Is my priority to render the other guilty or is my priority to satisfy my need?”

“Is my priority to be right and to make the other understand that he is wrong or is my priority to find a solution to improve the situation?”

These questions are important because a person placed in a guilty position will NEVER want to cooperate. The whole art of being heard, therefore, lies in expressing our need without putting the other in the position of being the culprit… expressing our need so that the other can be part of the solution, rather than accusing him of being the source of the problem!

It’s a slight adjustment in how we usually do things, but I can assure you it will make all the difference!

Here are a few ways to explore this new way of communicating about our problems and our frustrations:

 – First of all, let’s prioritize our needs and ask ourselves if the need that “triggers” us in  the moment is really important. Do I really need to change the situation, or is it not a priority?

– Then let’s ask ourselves if the other is really the source of the problem, or if it is our perception and our attitude that makes it a problem. For example, if the other’s behavior is unavoidable (a friend moans and complains about something trivial, an adult has bad table manners…) then can I change my attitude and tolerate the behavior? Can I detach myself?

– And if my need is indeed a priority, it would be wrong for me not to address the situation! One of the first keys is to speak in the “I” mode, which is non-accusatory, and ask the other to help us find a solution for meeting our need. For example, instead of saying “You never do the dishes when we give a dinner”, say “I like to have our friends over. I really like to share a good meal but I often feel overwhelmed and start thinking it’s not fair because so much of the work rests on my shoulders, I need help to be able to really enjoy these dinners. How do you feel about doing the dishes the next time we have guests over?”

– Finally we can check that the other person is really onboard with the solution we suggested. If we sense that we do not have a complete agreement, we can then “renegotiate”: “It seems like you’re not really happy with that solution. Do you have another idea?” or “Is there something else you could do to contribute that suits you better?”, “Do you have an idea that might work for both of us?”

Speaking this way means the other person is much less likely to feel “guilty” and is more inclined to help us meet our need.

What do you think? I invite you to post your comments on this page.

 

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

 

When I complain, I give my power away!

1 May

When I compainI give my power away, blog post (1)

When I complain I give my power away! To understand clearly what this means, I would like to invite you to read  an article I wrote,  “I am not a victim”, that explains clearly this dynamic.

To  be very honest with you doing the 21 days challenge to quit complaining litterally changed my life… It allowed me to stop resisting what was ” happenning to me” and instead be in the flow of my own life. I am now present to each day, present to my family and I get to enjoy all of it. And when something happens that I want to change, then I can concentrate my energy on the solution instead of being a victim of the situation.

I invite you to join the growing movement of people who choose to stop being victims of their lives and to become actors of change. Join the 21 day Iquitcomplaining {… and bitching} challenge at anytime.

I would be honored if you shared your experiences, challenges – successes, on this blog and I will answer any questions you might have.

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

Banish the word “struggle” from your attitude and vocabulary

21 Mar

Because sometimes, Native American wisdom is all we need to embrace our day!

hopi-elder

 

A Hopi Elder Speaks

“You have been telling the people that this is the Eleventh Hour, now you must go back and tell the people that this is the Hour.  And there are things to be considered. . .

Where are you living?
What are you doing?
What are your relationships?
Are you in right relation?
Where is your water?
Know your garden.
It is time to speak your Truth.
Create your community.
Be good to each other.
And do not look outside yourself for the leader.”

Then he clasped his hands together, smiled, and said, “This could be a good time!”

“There is a river flowing now very fast. It is so great and swift that there are those who will be afraid. They will try to hold on to the shore. They will feel they are torn apart and will suffer greatly.

“Know the river has its destination. The elders say we must let go of the shore, push off into the middle of the river, keep our eyes open, and our heads above water. And I say, see who is in there with you and celebrate. At this time in history, we are to take nothing personally, Least of all ourselves. For the moment that we do, our spiritual growth and journey comes to a halt.

“The time for the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves! Banish the word struggle from you attitude and your vocabulary. All that we do now must be done in a sacred manner and in celebration.

“We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.”

— attributed to an unnamed Hopi elder

Oraibi, Arizona

Summer Solstice 1999

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

Maybe there is more that brings us together than we think!

13 Mar

Three beautiful minutes!

Thank you TV2 Denmark  for this video, I shared it recently on my english Facebook page.

It brings up interesting and relevant points about how different we are… and, despite those differences, the communality of our human experience.

When we get rid of the habit of complaining in our lives, we begin to create space to see the beauty all around us, and the beauty in people different from us. The habit of judging others disappears…

 

Join the “I quit complaining {…and bitching}”  challenge at anytime… it is free! Become part of the growing movement of people who choose to refuse to be victims of their lives and of others!

#actdontcomplain

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

 

10 questions to start the year beautifully!

13 Jan

With a new year comes a new energy, the opportunity to take stock of the past year and put things in perspective for the year to come, to review our goals, to remove what does not make our heart sing, to keep only what is important, to get rid of interference.

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And what if in 2017 our watchword was “SIMPLIFY”, purging our lives of what we no longer want and keeping only what serves us?

Here are a few questions to help you on this path:

  1. What are the beautiful things that 2016 brought you?
  2. What do you want to CELEBRATE? What were your disappointments and difficulties, and how did they help you grow?
  3. Draw a traffic light on a white page.  – Next to the GREEN circle, write down: What do I want to do MORE? (What you have already done and want to continue pursuing in 2017?) – Next to the ORANGE circle, write: What do I want to learn to regulate? (What do I want to be vigilant about?) – Next to the RED circle, write: What do I want to stop because it does not serve me (or serves me badly)?
  4. What are the roles you play in your life? Give yourself brilliant titles for each one of these roles. Look at the different areas of your life: family, work, health, love, finances, spirituality, personal development, recreation. For each of these areas, give yourself several titles. For example, “the woman of his dreams” instead of the wife, or “genius of multi-tasking and tenderness” instead of mom, or “inspirational and inspiring messenger” instead of speaker, “brilliant CEO, stunning expert, logistics and transport genius, starred chef, cheerleader, adventurer, benevolent ambassador”… It’s up to you to play now!
  5. What are your goals for each of these roles? Write only goals that make your heart sing. Make sure they are specific and measurable and that when you read them you feel an impetus to move forward.
  6. What is THE THING that must happen in 2017? Be careful to differentiate between things that will happen no matter what and the things for which you have to free yourself of blocks but that it’s time to do this year. You are ripe, you are ready!
  7. UNDERSTANDING: In 2017, what do you want to unlearn? Identify limiting beliefs that create obstacles in your path. Unlearn these things that do not serve you and slow down, even prevent, your progress and fulfillment!
  8. RECOGNIZING: You will always have many unknowns and doubts in your life and this can disrupt you, slow you down, confuse you… but at any time you can reconnect with your truth. Among all your confusion, what do you know? What is clear? Remember your “why”. Why do you feel called to move in that direction? What makes you vibrate?
  9. DO: What are you going to do in 2017 starting next week? Once you have reconnected with your truth, then it is time to dare to act in accordance with this new reality. Do not postpone until later. Start now (even an inch a day) and you will see that you will already have made strides by the end of January
  10. What support do you need to achieve your goals? Education, resources, coaching, family, friends…? Feel free to use the full range of support options available to you!

I hope these questions will help you to move forward brilliantly, your heart swollen with audacity, to start the year beautifully! If this article has helped you, do not hesitate to share it with your loved ones and your friends.

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

The Key to Combining Power and Serenity in Your Life

15 Dec

Have you ever noticed how when we want to create change or give birth to a new reality in our life, we have a tendency to wait until everything is perfect?

Whether it be starting the challenge I Quit Complaining and Bitching, writing a book, launching an internet website, or a business… we can quickly start to feel overwhelmed by the huge amount of things one has to do to reach the finish line.

So, we either procrastinate and postpone to later the moment when we are going to handle the project. We tell ourselves “Later when I am ready and when conditions will be better…” Or full of ambition, we throw caution to the wind ignoring all our resources to go the distance. We forge ahead, going in all directions and after a few days, we start to get discouraged.

Today, I’d like to share with you the key to combining power and serenity in your life.

dream-believe-do-repeat-1

This key is REPETITION.

Instead of wanting to control and master everything, instead of wanting and waiting for everything to be perfect, I invite you to choose an action which will contribute to set the stage for the new reality or change that you want to generate and do this one thing EVERY DAY.

  • If you want to launch your book, write… every day (10 – 30 minutes, it’s up to you)
  • If you want to develop your internet visibility, publish an article on your blog… every day (it can be 3-30 lines, it’s up to you)
  • If you want to quit complaining, make a commitment to change one thing each day to improve your life…One small step, every day.
  • If you want to lose weight, combine a few exercise for 10- 15 minutes and repeat them… every day.
  • If you are starting a business, work on your business plan for 15 – 30 minutes… every day.
  • If you want to make a career change, do some research on the internet or read a book on subjects that interest you for 5 -30 minutes… every day.
  • If you want to change your mindset on money, take a close look at your bank accounts, read or listen to interviews, conferences, books or articles on the subject… for 5-30 minutes… every day.
  • If you want to develop a clientele or find a new job, make a few calls for 15-30 minutes… every day.

I can assure you that this repetition is really a great relief because you no longer have to do so much to create change in your life and yet, it is the act of repetition that will allow you to go far… one day at a time.

So what do you want to create this new coming year? Identify the action(s) that you will repeat every day and… start! When 2018 comes around, you’ll  probably be in a reality that you might never have even imagined.

Love & Respect,

Christine Lewicki

Want to you use this article in your newsletter, blog, or on your website? You can, as long as you include the following blurb:

“Christine Lewicki is a Bestselling Author, Speaker & Coach. She is committed to help people quit complaining and become entrepreneurs of their lives. You can download your FREE “I quit complaining” starter kit on her blog www.iquitcomplaining.com and visit her Facebook page for inspirational articles and quotes to reveal the best version of yourself each day!

 

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